https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-TgOCrnbmyU

someday something will make sense.. when it should matter...

raKH05041982

lie.

raKH05041982

sometimes a lie is the best thing...... its the best thing!!

sari raat...

its one of that day... i wish i could fuck my mistakes all over again .. TO MAKE THEM ALLRIGHT!!

#LOVER #DREAMER

#coke #syudio

raKH05041982

Do you know what i mean??

Do you know what i mean??

<3 it when it misses the point....

raKH05041982

life is....

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procrastinators dream!!

every now and then I try and fuck things up by doing something or the other right.. the right thing i do is i fuck something up wrongly..

its like you want to act kool but you end up being an asshole..
and or
you want to play safe but you have already lost the plot...

you develop a weak spot for things and those things get the best of you... they play you in every possible way and rub the wrong side...
.
.
.
but lets see ... how things turn up.. life needs to be uncertain...

i am kinda getting tired of the game.. but the game is catching up on me..

need blessings.. need to get rid of rum.. get back being 76 kgs.. and be able to priorities life's wants and needs.

need to learn to conquer the early morning sleep.. and the urge to stay awake late at night.

PS: tomorrow will be a beautiful day.. and i will do it...  !!

raKH05041982

sensei

you always wanted to see how singleness hurts.. how difficult it is being by yourself hurts..

you wanted me to be your guinea pig of curiosity ... i agreed...

not sure why i volunteered.. but not sure if i did... nor sure if i am being one.. nor is it helping me..

it might just be my inane stubborn mind that is just me... that is not wanting and not letting me change,.....


all said and done.. if i said i miss you.. you would win... laugh it out.. call me an asshole...

but everybody needs an asshole... all those who don't want to be full of shit..

its not that i dont miss you.. but missing you is not getting me anywhere..


you were strong.. you are strong.. ( thats what i want to believe.. i might be wrong)


you can have the last laugh if you want...

coz i have forgotten to laugh... (i was once good at it... it helped me get away to wonderland)

#period


raKH05041982

warmth !!

this three day long weekend is so boring... i wish i could sleep over nice grass and feel the morning due when i wake up...

#ganpati bappa morya!!

on the other thought ... does it have to be this way??

raKH05041982

there comes a time...

there comes a time ... there comes a time that wont ever stop for you...

there comes a time when alcohol becomes the best friend .. your worst enemy...

there come a time when food becomes your first love when you want wish you were on a diet...

there comes a time when cigarettes become your basic need .. needlessly...

there comes a time when you hate your job but you hate your long weekend more ...

there comes a time when you can buy sex .. but you would rather stare at the sun...

there comes a time when rock'n'roll makes your heart at peace but your mind at a war...

there comes a time when love is abundant but all you need us ego massage...

there comes a time when you fit exactly in your own shoes but they give a shoe bite on your soul...

there comes a time when your stomach is bigger than your heart...

there comes a time when ice cube melt faster than the passing phase in your life...

there is a time when your mind works faster than your hands... only out of phase ...

there is time when you want time to stop... but it moves swiftly as always...

there comes a time when life on the other side looks... greener...

there comes a time when time moves real fast and your life seems at a standstill....

there is a time when you want to catch your childhood buy all you reach out is your middle age...

there comes a time when God whats your love but the devil gets your anger...

there comes a time when your see a well known stranger in the mirror...

it is when .. you know the time is right for everything to be not right but not wrong either....
it was always this way.. but you and I were to naive.. or too smart to ignore the basics of life..
this is what we were taught when we were young.. this is what we were taught in school.. to believe in ...

but there comes a time when we realize .. when we wake up... come to our senses... dumb-folded...
there comes a time we try to sort things out.. only to get more entangled .. more stuck and more occupied...
and then time runs out.. the end is always the same.

the end is sweet and its peaceful. PERIOD.

raKH05041982

samsara ... the circle of life

this is a vicious circle... #life, #office, #alcohol, #introspection, #penance. #repeat

circle of life will continue to roll. . .

raKH05041982

soft target!!

there is new she.. who is kicking the old she out .. you so strong.. you so beautiful.

#FML #FTW

raKH05041982

... then alcohol kicks in...

so yet another day when i realized how i live in the world i have created in my head... and built walls around me... my mind

the room is filled with my own fancy imagination.. thoughts that wont come true in my real world... may be... may be not in my created infectious world...

life gives chances to wake up... break those walls... reach out...  hold those who seek your hand... bank on those shoulders that are real...

but then alcohol kicks in...

cements those walls in mind... builds those walls stronger.. taller... and life goes on...

to dream is not a crime... and to dream all the more is not a crime... dreams paint those walls.. 

but then alcohol kicks in...

blurs those dreams... shadows those thoughts... dilutes the goal...

to dream you need to sleep... and to make those dreams come true you need wake up... act!!

you try to search for the needle that points north in hay of prejudice... but in vein...

but then alcohol kicks in...

sleep goes for a toss.. and in turn dreams have to wait.. and the ones that come are intoxicated... 

intoxicated dreams.. troubled waters... walls that wont break... mind that wont escape the prison build by these closed walls..

and again alcohol kicks in... 

conscious comes in to play... reality strikes... lightening crashes...

dreams become a thought that makes you laugh... reality ridicules the mind... life gets tough.. 

and then additional alcohol kicks in...

another glass of drink is on the table... thought are clouded... but there is a silver lining...

body aches... thoughts pinch... the ice slowly melts... it reminds you of the fading breath... you feel tired..

times limited... so is alcohol... but dreams go on .. mind goes on and on in to a loop..

each loop opens a new dream.. a dream that helps you build the wall higher... clouds your mind 

and so the story goes.. you wait patiently for alcohol to get over.. so the dream can end.. the walls can break... may be collapse on its own burden..

but then alcohol kicks in..

your friends get the liquid gold... and the story never ends... somehow you take the U turn... and life starts over.. the second U turn brings you to square one...

yet another day.. yet another thought... yet another peg... 

circle of incomplete life completes. restarts. resumes. 

..

#COLDPLAY - EVERY TEARDROP IS A WATERFALL

#METALLICA - TURN THE PAGE



raKH05041982

kal hum unki galiyon se gujare.. dil tirat bitar ho gaya..  unki yaad ne pal aisa jehrila bana diya.. jeena beraham ho gaya..

woh pal.. woh lamhe.. woh baatein..

itni jaldi etihaas ho jayegi.. shayad kabhi socha naa tha..

zindagy kya gul khilayegi yeh ek ajooba reh jayega...

kaash.. hamare haath mein woh kismat hoti ki.. khuda bhi khud kehta.. aur kya chahiye tujhey pagle...

#nekochan

and then she turned away... as if it all was a dream... 

raKH05041982

these eyes !!

these eyes...

                                                                      "These Eyes"

These eyes cry every night for you
These arms long to hold you again
The hurtin's on me, yeah
But I will never be free, no, my baby, no, no
You gave a promise to me, yeah
And you broke it, you broke it, oh, no

These eyes watched you bring my world to an end
This heart could not accept and pretend
The hurtin's on me, yeah
But I will never be free, no, no, no
You took the vow with me, yeah
And you spoke it, you spoke it, babe

These eyes are cryin'
These eyes have seen a lot of loves
But they're never gonna see another one like I had with you

These eyes are cryin'
These eyes have seen a lot of loves
But they're never gonna see another one like I had with you

These eyes are cryin'
These eyes have seen a lot of loves
But they're never gonna see another one like I had with you

These eyes cry every night for you
These arms, these arms long to hold you, hold you again, ahh

These eyes are cryin'
These eyes have seen a lot of loves
But they're never gonna see another one like I had with you

These eyes are cryin'
These eyes have seen a lot of loves
But they're never gonna see another one like I had with you

These eyes are cryin'
These eyes have seen a lot of loves
But they're never gonna see another one like I had with you

These eyes are cryin'
These eyes have seen a lot of loves
But they're never gonna see another one like I had with you
Baby, baby, baby, baby

raKH05041982

let music destroy you..

if music destroys you.. consider yourself lucky.

there are uglier things in this world that can fuck you up.. destroy you!!

this will destroy you - threads

the complete album is a gem of a piece. bus you should be in the best frame of mind.

raKH05041982

LOST!!

not sure if its alcohol or its the feeling under the influence of alcohol that is more dangerously addictive..

i wish i could be sailing the ocean .. the doldrums of waves crashing.. crashing dreams..

and then once in a while a fish of hope gets your hook.. the worm stuck to it is what deceives fish that has high hopes of crossing great oceans..

fish of hope gets sliced.. and is served on a platter.. but the alcohol on the table has won the battle...

fish is consumed without acknowledgement..

fish has no one to cry too.. and so did the worm.

the circle of life .. it does get complete. it does not explain the laws it follows.

the circle of life at times ends in straight line .. a straight line... open up.

what we do may not be what we seek. what we seek may not be what we expect. what we expect may not be what we want. what we want may not be what we care about. what we care about may be already LOST.

sometimes things we lose remain closer to our hearts.
while our hearts are LOST.,

raKH05041982

music .. let it be your life

yea.... let it be your life... music.

everybody you love will love someone else you dont love.

music won't.

its not all that ...

over the years.. i have learnt... being an asshole is not all that difficult.

you just have to try ...

#FTW

sometimes.. some times just stay put.

sometimes random songs pop up in your head and then stay there as if its no ones business.

so is the case with some thoughts, some day dreams and most nightmares..

yesterdays dreams became nightmares by the time they ended...


sometimes its so awesome to be lost.. directionless..

sometimes its so not good to be on the path that people want you to take..

sometimes its just nice to listen to your heart and then do the opposite thing...

sometimes its worth it.. most of the times.. its just a passing phase...

new radicals.. your get what you give.




raKH05041982

the END.. its just a beginning.

now this is one hell of a performance...

get high.. go to a concert.. remember you hate the world.. world is being mean to you. you cant play smart..
you wish to stay naive.. simple.. innocent... you want to live for the day.. die at peace.


but life wishes you a roller coaster life... so they play this song... and you are blown into pieces you cant and don't want to call your own... but in the end they are you. they reflect a trait of you. you.

and then life drift on....

the END.. its just a beginning. BHENCHOD... live it.. rock it.. its only gonna happen once... LIFE!!


raKH05041982

i forgot my password today..

there was trouble few days back.. now the bottle of rum is empty and the trouble is gone..
will watch queen today... flappy bird was useless today...

the last person i wanted to be on twitter is an twitter addict... but phony fuckers are everywhere...

not that i am a big twitteratti ... but come on.. what the hell.. i hate that person. :)


come to think of it.. i shouldn't have forgotten my password today. gmail.. you did help me recover it in less than a minute.. you are so cute... (rum talking.. though rum didn't make me forget the password.)


PS: hope they find atleast 1 person alove on the Malaysian airline.. he can tell us what exactly happend.

raKH05041982

a week that was different...

it was indeed a very very fuckin beautiful last week.. felt weak.. grew stronger.. meaner and will mould myself to be a even stronger bastard to face this bhenchod world.

life as such will be the best teacher. time will be the best tester. and old monk will be the best companion.

worked hard.. smarter.. drank responsibly.. smile on her face was the baksheesh ..

life.. we all know.. not all is free in this world... but what ever is... just grab it.

sweetleaf

raKH05041982