all is violent .. all is bright

sometimes being an asshole is so easy.. its just not funny...
random crazy carefree and thoughtless actions help you be 1..

if i had one msg for the last few weeks of my life..its would be... i am sorry for being an asshole i didn't enjoy... i cud have done better.. i will .. try at least!!

if only i had a magic wand like that chutiya harry potter.. i wud have changed  few things in the last week.. that will definitely wont haunt me when i am drunk on my fav old monk...

butterNan.. u are sweet.. i am crazy.. i wud only get fucked if u followed this blog like 1 once asked u to.. just pray that no one puts those electrical wires in to this dumb brain of mine .. afterall there are now more than 9 million bicycles in Beijing..  ;)

i am still yet to find a nice alias for her.. all she does is be her. and all i do is ..admire her..
she is indeed very very beautiful.. and she is my hello kitty !!
she is random and really interesting ..
she is fun to be in admiration with..
she is skittish..
she is ...

captions are just words.. sometimes words are just not enough..

thoughts arrive like a butterfly but her aura lingers on... #crazyness

its been a long since when i last heard god is an astronaut and this time its much more fun..

(life is crazy naa?? after all its just our state of mind.. #life there is always a war going on .. )

raKH05041982

sly.. shrewd.. though innocent

definitely not about god....

human mind .. why cant it all think alike... or should the statement be.. thank god!!... not all think alike..

all others animals have mind too.. but the difference is.. they almost think alike.. they want to eat .. fuck only to keep the race alive and die.. humans do a lot more than this...though originally they were designed to do these 3 simple tasks..

but human mind had a different plan.. 1 of the mind made Buddha.. the other made Hitler.. and so on..

complications didn't end here.. human mind evolved further into his and her.. at this time my mind clearly says not to get into anything complicated...

weird it is ...how the same mind things differently at different situations and under different influence ...
alcohol makes the strongest muthfukr emotional... and cocaine makes every chutiya a tarzen...
been watching a lot of intense shit on TV.. 1 old man creates history.. so other 2 bastards want to replicate the old man .. the 1st asshole fools a whole nation .. wants to go on 2nd rath yatra... while the 2nd asshole thinks 3 days of fast will wash away 3 weeks of bloodbath..

all this aside.. my own mind is having a tough time coping up with difference it is having with itself..  the funny part of the mind is not active .. but the cynic is alive and kicking ... its clear.. the mind is not free .. it is engulfed in some hate love relationship with external forces that are beginning to control the controls..

every now and then i try ..i try real hard but i don't try long enough.. you cant say i give up.. i give in...

iska kisine kya beegada thaa.. jo iske beena jeena adhura hai :)

raKH05041982

fuck me up!!

its so easy to fuck with me...and my mind... and put me in a downward spiral... its just not funny..

but the best part is....i am a goldfish...  my memory is like a goldfish... i go to sleep...and i forget everything...

and then some sweet motherfucker will fuck my brains out...completely... !!
and then i solve the issue with a nice 8 hour sleep!!


dude...u must have been kidding...but it fucked my mind completely... i hope u were kidding!! its really not what i wanted to hear at this moment of time...may be after a few more days...

raKH05041982

ping-pong balls of mumbai

past is always a lovely thing...present is always the most fucked up...and the future is the most anticipated thing... i dont know why the time moves slowly when you are on your way to the party...and the time moves fast during the party...and then while you are on the way back ....if u are high....wasted...time flies....i think about that a lot...the more i think...it hurts...it makes me realize ...nothing!!

coming back to the post...what ever this post is suppose to mean to u....i dont care a ...FUCK...

after a normal days hard work at work...completely mind fucked...i call dipti...i tell her...lets head to leo's or gokul... she says....i ll come...u meet miya at fort...i meet miya...dips is still in office ..i finish having my beer...miya has rum with coke....the chicken crispy....dips is still in office...i am sure she was not impressing her bosses....trying to create a good image ...but she had to stay and get the work done...so she let us have some good time to bond.....while she worked...that was the first time i was having a drink with miya...

2 bottles of kingfisher...i am happy high...i am really happy... despite friday night...i need to get the hell out of there and rush home to get peaceful sleep so that the brain can survive...yet another days torture....

at VT station platform no: 2 this guy sells chana dal....not saadha chana dal...he sellls masala chana dal... maa chudi...what amazing chana-dal mixture he makes....with those special chatuney of some awesome stuff....full kanda maarke...masala chana daal ....fuck-t rupiye paach la... just for Rs. 5....

as i am enjoying the chana-dal swaad....as the chana-dal starts getting lesser and lesser in the paper plate that it is in ...there is surprise...HOT models posing for a firang bra and chaddies ka brand....slowly slowly as the chana-dal on the place decreases..a part of the picture is visible.... and i am not sure...the taste of the fucking chana-dal all of a sudden increases few folds...embroidered bras....and blah blah blah...models are hot...and i was sure the beer was not active...

i remember ...chana-dal wala telling me a few days back...."saab"....."hamara chana-dal kafi phemos hai"... and i was like.... pata hai, pata hai....

i was in a such a doldrums...spending time in office and feeling dead.... i was too bored...i meet miya...dipti was still working ..and the mood starts getting better as the beer made itself comfortable in my tummy....comfortable beer made me feel comfortable...chana-dal made me feel alive...and the models on the paper spiced it all up.....on my way back to vashi...the local train makes me feel at home...i am happy to be back in mumbai...where i truly feel fucked up and still enjoy every bit of it ...this city is so fucked up...the ppl are so fucked up....just like i am ....but everyday we bounce bac....soheb was happy to enjoy old MONK, and bounce back to life...i bounced back to life with two beers at GOKUL behind THE TAJ and some good time with soheb miya ready to take on life i cant desribe" ....we are the ping-pong balls of mumbai...true mumbai-kars


dips worked that day till midnight....she bounced back by partying next night...

shabbo...nice to hear from you that TASMAC has finally started selling firangi daru in their shops....JD and CR and others are now available .....

PS : i threw the paper after eating the chana-dal in the train...not in the dust-bin :| . .

raKH05041982

keep on rocking in the free world...

gone are the days when IM and PM were associated with messengers and internet..
then it was IM - instant messenger & PM - personal message...

now it is IM - indian mujahideen & PM - pakistani mujahideen
dont understand why the hindu radicals are doing what they have started....it might become a cult some day.... after all the gr8 HINDU gowd once eradicated a terrorist who stole his wife for her beauty....
:(

Neil Young once wrote a very beautiful song...its got meaning too ....

I see a girl in the night
with a baby in her hands
Under an old street light

near a garbage can

Now she put her kid away, she's gone to get a hit
She hates her life, and what she's done with it
That's one more kid, that'll never go to school
Never get to fall in love, never get to be cool


Keep on rocking in the free world
keep on rocking in the free world
keep on rocking in the free world
keep on rocking in the free world

yeah thats what we are suppose to do....

no matter who fucks whom and who fucks the other fucker in return, whether its for oil or strategic alliance for military...getting the nuclear deal signed or finding a cure for cancer....or leaving your next generation a chance to taste a burger thats so famous in uncle sam's world...or what ever it may be....

yeah ...u got it right... we are suppose to ..sing and follow

keep on rocking in the free world

PS : remember the ice is melting and its all gonna wash our sins....

raKH05041982

a crazY littel things called LOVEDA...

LOVEDA...loveda lag gaya zindagy kaa...deep down south...aisa lagata tha ek din ek hafte ke barabar hia...dimaag mein itni chutiyagiri ho rahi thee kee...aise lag raha tha butterNan playing football with my heart in my head was much more fun...sala her ek din...woich tensionor sales target...EOD dimmaga ka bhosada ho jaata tha...pata tha jab yeh sab khatam ho jaayega ...sala poorani kabar khodke poorani baante and yaadon ko sochke bada majja ayega....jhendu ke phool ki tarah dil khil jaayega...

out of the many things..yeah many things....i know i wont miss many of them...

i mean if a man had nothing gr8 happening in his life... i am sure he will start appreciating all the chutiyagiri happening around him...he will surely enjoy it...

if i went shouting loveda loveda loveda...i would get slapped in mumbai...this fear once came true when the off duty cop who had the balls of frustrated trapped anger to slap me on a muthafukin DIWALI day...yeah that was like a big cracker bursting right on my face....chutiya burhaan wanted to buy chaddi....and to buy chaddi he comes all the way to vashi from kharghar....its not like ppl in kharghar mein log undies nahi pehan te....the reason is there is a famous chaddi-baniyan shop in the lane next to golden punjab and navratna....right next to jhama in sector 17 vashi..

we chediots (chediots are nothing but chutiyaas who are also idiots).... ho ho ho...it was our fav adda.... sitting on bikes parked in from on navratana...adda for getting together....chill out...drool on the hot girls and aunty's who came shopping in the sec 17 market...buy chhota baatlees of wodkaa and then flip open the bottle of sprite...gulp 3/4th of the sprite the bitter way..and then mix the two miscible liquids.... the chhota baatlee in the remaining 1/4th sprite...then the ritual used to be ..waiter will try to show that he is a true lost maharashtrian indian...dance with the sprite baatlee having wodka like a bartender...sprinkle 4 drops of daru for the ppl who are not with us...and then drink the sweet concentrate to glory...me..mikhail..lez...waiter...claude.. and others.....

chutiyagiri to hona hi tha...burhaan was with romstone...and usual we have a healthy exercise of words of wisdom.... parade of galis begin... bencho...bhosdaaa...maa ki aaag...it was like we are full of them..... i tell burhaan, jab woh patlee gali se kamati ho raha tha.... LOVEDAy...( in proper bumbaiyaa style)... apni size ki chaddi kharidnaa..and then burhaan with his loud mouth goes...blah blah blah....loveda bada hai to meri kya galti...and i say...jaa be loveday...jaa...undie kharid...

and then i dont remember what happpen...there is that gap ...i dont remember anything.... next think i remember a khaki...is in front of me, me surprised...trying to take my case....woh maamoo ka gussa pata nahi kahan se aaya...apne chhote nanhe ke saamne hi raises his had ...ONE TIGHT SLAP...silence...then pandu thoda much much kiya...and in few more seconds we left the scene....

LOVEDA bola....jhapad khaya :|

i still couldnt figure out ....whats with this crazy little thing..word loveda....the best thing in chennai, or coimbatore, or in madurai...or TN for that matter....there would not be any police who would slap me if i went on a parade shouting out loud loveda loveda loveda...why ?... its simple.... love is nothing but love...and "da" is a fix they use....like in mumbai we use "re" or "be"...

coming back to missing things...the list may be long...but few are like...

i miss that dude who looked ditto like forest whitaker, who didnt understand a phaaaking word of hindi, he made excellent cofee...the MR bakery on Gokhale road off cross cut road in ramnagar in coimbatore and the small coffee shop behind murugan temple in vadapalani in chennai...who made coffee even better but always insisted on mee eating cookies and bananas...

miss that ultra fucked up amman mess ...what a mess that mess was in...where the parotta with kurma was a killer...and half boil....ha ha ha...half boil is actually a half fry egg...frankly i stopped giving a damn...coz the taste was as good as ghar ka khana....

miss aachi mess in tatabad was homefood....and so was the mess close to aachi...which was special for its non-veg...

miss Sathyam Cinemas which could have easily become a living room with awesome surround dolby sound, full time working AC, and a source of innocent ego-free pop-corns...if i was to stay in chennai for longer than a year....

marina was a playground...Thiruvanmayur beach was the best open house bar...miss them

i miss walking randomly on the streets of T-nagar....it was a hopeful place...where i always dreamed of bumping into the awesomo butterNan ....but only dreams of true color come true....mOnOchromatic dreams are hard to come true...

the dude who used to give me and mangesh a happy smile everytime we went to buy coke and chakhnaa..those plastic glasses are being missed....those green TASMAC boards...
and that dudes elder bro...whos tamilish ( a mix of tamil and english) persuaded me to buy a tata sky connection....(fuck...there was no way i would miss euro cup)

that lady who took gr8 deal of interest in making mootai-lapa or mootai-podimas and who would enquire about where we had dinner last night every time we skipped dinner at her shop....and showed that she cares...and she did.

miss hanging out with keshavmoorthy and velayutham swamy ...who took much interest in teaching me tamil, withouth them i would be gangraped in coimbatore and chennai... abdul bhai, who was a complete timepass character.....it was fun teaching him few hindi words....

i miss curd rice, oorga...pappad

miss those 2 bloody mechanics who conned me into buying a fucked up bike and feeling happy about it...mayeer is what i called them in my mind ....the only slang i learnt...down south... sometimes, the things that interest you the most are never tought....you gotta learn them on your own...in this case, I chose not to learn how or wha they say ....those slangs in tamil....slangs are common in mumbai and north...madarchode, behahchode...i still dont know how they say it in tamil....i knew i would never need to use them in a land of so many GODS...

all i know is...I was an interesting character before living in tamil nadu.....Now i am an even more frigging special interesting character....

above all....i miss the way i used to miss my life in tamil nadu...i miss the way i used to miss mumbai/bombay....i miss the way i missed my friends... the way mumbaikars struggle it out...the way they fight to keep their miserable lives above the bare minimum happiness level...the way they slap all the stress and bounce back like a ping pong ball everyday in the morning (few of the mumbaikars ounce at night)....the way we use madarchode benchode and not actually mean it...the way we laugh it out when we miss the local train despite doing everything on time....the way we eat a vadapav as a treat from a chindhy rich friend....the way auto-rickshaw-wallahs charge you by the meter...and nothing more...the way the food kooked in slums, packed nicely by young kids in unclean plastic is consumed with satisfaction buy the middleclass...the leafy vegetables grown from the gutter/sewage ka pani on the sides of railway track, are treated as a healthy organic food....i missed it all....

sometimes it is necessary to separate yourself from the city you love ....only to fall in love with it all over again...


PS :"love da....benchode" & "maa-chudi"....are my most frequently used fav galis.


raKH05041982

under the color tv . . . . . .chemical locha explained...

12the september 10am...waiting for the crocodile to decide my future...not wanting o think too much...i scribbled the thought in my head...

all i did was sit under the color tv on the first floor, wait for hours ...for her to come online...if she came online..the heart used to skip a beat..it was becoming more of a exercise for my heart...and then jump with her in the world of insane fun, chat, innocent flirting and what ever it was ...i was a balloon filled with vapors of happiness geld with laughter.... and if she didn't come online...i used to imagine that if she came online...today....blah blah blah... its clear...my brain was super scrwed...chemical locha...and if she came online and couldnt chat...i was like a balloon filled with fart...heart broken...sunti knows exactly what i used to go through...

then one day in a mail...i get a picture of her and i start getting high...high on her beauty...instant love at not really first sight....and blah blah blah...baBa crashes...

few things were matching matching...like a sari with a 2 by 2 ka cutpiece blouse ..sometimes no matching matching...andhra ka hero ka dressing style ke tarah...here i am talking about tastes interests thoughts....etc...

PBS (pearls before swine) was perfect matching matching...she loves it so much that she will order for books of PBS online and happily pay in $s...i love it so much that i will scan the whole fucking web to get free soft copies...few more matching matching things were rain-dance, world peace, nailbiting performances sunshine etc...the non matching things can go and fuck themselves...not worth mentioning here....

never met her, never had a word with her, just chats and exchange of sms's ...and fal in love might sound like a big chutiyagiri...and now sometimes i do agree it as a chutiyagiri ...but what else is not a chutiyagiri in this world....sometimes...most of the times...sometimes all the time...this life is a BIG chutiyagiri...I mean we cant have everything, at times we dont even get 50% of the things we dream of...coz we are always tought to dream big...dream of the impossible...fuck those...who really tell us to do that....unrealistic reality... and then few things that we want in life, come in our life and before we are able to blink, they are frigging out of the life...turn our...i get a chance to meet her in her hometown ...madgrasss.....(madgrass = chennai)...i meet her...and i force my self to blink...but before i can blink...all i know was....i am saying...dude...i dont know what the fuck is happening....sunti is like...baBa... get a life...


everything comes to a standstill...the balloon is pinpricked...hona kya hai...typical hindi fillum scene shot....she get engaged...and tamasha dekhta reh gaya...baBa...kabhi kabhi you miss the starting gun in a race that u dont want to win....and consequences dont let you participate the races you want to win...thoda bahoot jyaada late ho gaya...but what the hell...khud ko tasalli dene ke liye...they say naa...try kiya naa...jee kholke try kiya....thoda bahoot safalata bhi praapt kiya...

the problem was her jaadu had spread to such a high degree that she started becoming the ideal girl friend to have....but then like some wise man called baBa once said.... whats ideal in this world apart from DEATH...?

friends went to movies..i chose to sit under the tv, bewda dost log went to daru-party...i was sitting under the tv...team-mates busy making presentations to impress lifeless teachers...i was sitting under the tv...on the day of the eggjams, everybody slogging their ass to reduce the fat and get in shape....i am found under the tv.. at times till 11 pm... pataOfying the watchman... to let me sit under the tv...so that i can be online...i can chat...i can feel like a happy balloon.... there was life under the tv....there was joy...there was timepass, there was fun, there was me...sitting all most all the time when i am not doing anything ....under the tv on the first floor was what i love calling "stairway to heaven"...but i couldnt hear...the wind blow, and did i know my stairway to heaven was on the whispering wind....

to accompany me when she was not around online was naruto, bleach, weeds, pink floyd, gtalk, and my fuckin awesome laptop ......


PS :the crocodile kinda surprised me....said...mumbai se jyaada pyaar tujhse aur koi nahi kar sakta...he transferred me to mumbai....

raKH05041982

perplexed thoughts of a bewildered mind of a disoriented boy.

fuck...life is a bych....and i seriously need to play a pimp... i need to learn to hustle... i need to be bad... i need to learn to be mean... i need to be a ...what a typical niggah would say...in snoop dogg style... a muthafukn hustler...

bloody hell...slept like a pig... the whole fucking night...yesterday night...slpt the fuckin full morning... why....coz i was tired... the fever and the food poisoning had fucked up the chemical combination and hormones were all running loose in random directions....

dint speak to more than 3 ppl in the whole day... the chaiwala... the medical shopkeeper who gave me that awesome cough syrup....god..that really helps me sleep like a pig.... i am a fan....and the third one is me... yeah i was talking to me in the mirror... somehow i feel that me in the mirror is always smarter than me...

and at 6 30 chhota boss calls me up..says call bada boss... bada boss is always in straight forward mood... he said... come and meet me.... and from there go to mumbai... ...fuck.. i mean..i was dying to get back to mumbai....i was so frigging desperate to go back to mumbai... and i was not really expecting such a fast procedure to gop back...but neverthless...i am tired of living in chennai... a part of me is still in chennai... and then a part of me is going to in coimbatore... i am tired of eating funny food.... though its healthy.... i mean...i can go on ...on... on... but i need to stop, this time. its not really a bad place to live in. once u go with the flow...i am sure anyone will enjoy.. this place...

its like that white skinned 86 year young firang dadi-maa i met in sulochana spinning mills on the metttupalayam road... bhadwee is staying in kothagiri for the last 30 years...running a descent international school ...speaking fluent tamil...enjoying her last few years of insane life... enjoying her coffee and idlee dosa...spoke to her and asked her.... how did she like this place... she said...i just liked it... those bloody lovely hippies...surely knew where to find peace....( kothagiri is in the nilgiri's)


so i guess i shall find myself in mumbai in few more days...just need to sort a few things.......gosh... bombay was so much better...it shounded more hip and less ghati :P

will watch saroja today....night show... hope the movie is a good one...and it wud be mooolah well spent. have to take care of few things. will love all.

peace comes in small pieces at times.

raKH05041982

strawbery flavoured condoms

there is a lot of gas.... a lot of gas trapped in the earth...that is what is keeping the earth floating....and that proves that this earth is not sitting on a giant tortoise :k)

they are laying a pipeline to get gas into india from iran trough pakistan and there is a lot of research going on in the krishna godavari sector for gas... the more gas they suck out...there is a going to be issues..

we might sink... the earth is floating ...coz the gas might not be replaced by anything...so there would be a cavity and the crust might crumble....and a lot of countries are actually above the sea level b3couse there is a lot of gas below those countries.... the more gas u extract the more trouble!!

its all too complicated but most of it makes sense....all u have to do is watch southpark and family guy :)
i am in no mood to blog coz today i have a lot of gas in my tummy....


someone gave me a eno ( eno de jhat se aaram) ... (please read jhat as jhat a.k.a quick and not as jhaat a.k.a ...i am not gonna mention what jhaat is :P ) ...and said....have it ass soon ass it is put in the water....but that generated so much gas bubbles that i choked on it....so that gas actually came out of my nose and a lil bit actually creeped to my brain....and that when i realized... that my brain is actually bigger that my heart....

my heart is now a smart muscle... it pumps blood ... so does everybodies heart....and now a days my heart skips a beat every time a butterFLY in my tummy dies of gas poisoning ... i already told u....there is a lot of gas in my tummy.... i am eating a lot of spicy food...mostly chicken and i am looking for a duck....( butterFLYs in tummie happen when heart skips a beat for the wrong reason  )

these (ducks and chicken) birds are amazing... they dont fly and u cant curse them... u see GOD must have been a really smart thing... .he created these bird but didnt gave them any wings....actually they do have wings but they are as good as not having any.... i mean instead of useless wings if he had given then gas problem all the time....it would create regular gas in their tummy.... they cud have not needed winds to fly...

unfortunately my weight is too high or earth really sucks....u see Einstein invented this thing called relativity... so when newton was day dreaming about hot women under a tree...the theory of relativity came into play and he saw a apple fall down.... goood ness he must be so outta his mind that he created gravity.... i mean.... what about those poor lil hot women who were on his mind.... never mind... gravity fucked it up for both men and women... these days men need Viagra and women need push up bra's.....


then this stupid scientist invented silicon implants.... i mean... Pamela gives so many of us hard times... students cant study....adults loose sleeps.... oldies hate their life....gurls feel jealous....bitches ( female dogs ) only wish that thank god Pamela is not one of them...we shud call that scientist scien-tits

sometimes i think too much...and sometimes i dont think at all about the things i am thinking...

all the gas.... in my tummmy... makes grumbling sound...and at times it leaks from the far end of my smaller intestine....fuck.... i shud really stop now...else blogger s will not appreciate this blog....

those who read it....shud try and not search for the humor in this blog coz there is no humor...

there is a lot of gas.... in this world and in every bodies tummies....

the last i heard was scientists are studying the about of gas that comes out of a cows tummy while she digests her food and its impact on global warming... i mean they can leave alone the poor cow who gives us milk....and concentrate on indigestion issues human beings are facing...our farts are creating more global warming that those poos cows...and we dont even give milk :) .... oh women do .....sometimes....


milk is a awesome thing...and it actually helps in reducing the gas in the tummmy... i shud go get a badam milk... i always wonder why they show newly wedded wives giving their newly wedded husband a glass of hot milk.... cows milk reduces gas and gas is what they need to pump .... the more gas they pump into their wives the chances of satisfaction are more...and the more they pump...oohhhhh crap...why dont i just shut the fuck up...... ( that to me )

remember the times when our dads and their true wives used to buy us gas balloons when we were kids.... thats only to make their kids more smart.... frankly speaking... they can give us a carrot and ask us to shut the hell up...and they can have a walk in the clouds and romance....but no... no mom and their true husbond do that to thier kids...gas balloons build bonds....


gas really helps.... inert gas help more....


PS : the title of this post is only too lure ignorant bada-studs to read this blog....strawbery flavoured condoms


:)

plastic

i met this lady today... i mean i actually didnt meet her... i just happened to be in the same shop... i was selling pencils and other stationary :) ... she was there too buy stationary..

now who the fuck cares about plastic.. its got no emotions... its got know heart... it has not feelings... but that poor lil bastard has a life thats long.... i am talking about plastic. they say that this plastic can live so long that dude... who lived for a really long time in mahabharata .. what was his name...... bhishma peeta-mahan ...sale ko bhi sharam aayega...and there is another kinda plastic.... these days can be re-resurrected again and again... i mean ...its like killing and bringing it back to life... gosh.. killing it to bring it back to life...what a nice thought... its called recycling :)

so now this plastic is so awesome that it can be what it wants... the last i heard was these carry bags can be a nice hallucinating thing...u need to burn it... and then u get some residue... smoke it.... yuks... now ...who the heck will do all that mehnat... just to get high... no one i know...

so now coming back to the aunty .. she wants to buy pens... cheap ones... which her son can loose and she can still be kool about it..else she wud fucking freak out..and slap that innocent kid... so that he dont loose again... its a weird way of teaching things... thats what they used to do to slaves... to prisoners and to deshdrohi ppl....

fuck...drifting again...

coming back to aunty... aunty chooses from a plethora of Rs 5 pen...and to my luck...she fuckin buys both the pens of my company...and i am like... nysh nysh ( read nice like a child ).... aunty has made the right choice... unkal must be a happy man... unkal ki jai ho ...for keeping aunty happy and sane....

so i get lost in thought... i do that often... get lost in thoughts and keep wondering ... wondering about lost thoughts... and then come back to life... its nysh ... thing.. coming back to life...

and then the aunty leaves... and then as she is leaving the shop... she comes back...and says... anna!!.. oor carry bag koodengah :) ..translated back to inglees ( which is very soon going to be the national language... of modern india ) ...it will mean.. brother!! give me a carry bag. so there i was... i just went numb... i mean not completely.. but i can say... i went numb.. i was like... why is this nice aunty who made the perfect choice of buying the pens which i wanted her to by... asking for carry bags... ok!! ...now its a common thing...asking anything that u may get free .... is a really nice thing.... but she bought 2 pens..worth Rs 10... weighing less than 15 grams... and now she bloody wants a carry bag... fucking nuts...

first things is first... in total she made 2 mistake. .1st one is not hat harmful ... infact its not a mistake..i am just terming it as a mistake... its my mistake.. she called the shop-keeper annaa :P.. .ok.. .not funny....but funny enough to kill some time.... 2nd mistake is that she wants a carry bag for 2 pens weighing less than 15 grams in total :(

the shopkeeper must have got angry... ek to "anna" bola...ab phokat mein bag maang rahi hai... charana fookat mein aata hai kya.... he he :P ( maa chudi ;) .. . i miss this slang word .. one of the most common word in mumbai)

so this lady...aunty is now all happy..swings her plastic carry bag... and walks out of the shop jaise jhansi ki rani panipat ki ladhai jeet ke aayi ho....but i knew ... she has done her bit in polluting the earth.... my hippie mind wanted to stop her... but i cud not ... hippies are so peace loving.. that they wont fight and try to prove their point across... that is the sole reason why the hippie movement died...but not completely... ppl like me and druv are still fighting for a lost cost... we are modern hippies... we use plastic :D

moral of the story... fuck the moral...try and stop using plasic... plstic is harmful and its better if we use it as less as possible. someday hippies will return and hippies will rule.... till then eric cartman can keep hating hippies and that bloody jew kid who never geevs up...nor geevs in....

plastic is what we are becoming... loosing our emotions... loosing our heart.... loosing our feelings... loosing our senses... loosing it all... killing in the name of ..... blaming the innocent.. using more and more things we dont want... dont need ...can do without ....

this is out new walk of LIFE :)

( yeah..i am listening to the awesome dire-straits whos cd if u purchase will come in a plastic cover ... we are left with no choice... bloody maggots is what we are gonna be in the end )

PS : i do use plastic... a lot of it.. i am not doodh ka dhula hua... but i do have a choice. i choice to crib... nag... someday... ill stop others from using plastic... i am so far not able to stop myself from using plastic.

raKH05041982

sare jahan se achha...

ppl ....my dear phrands...if u are here.... u shud be really lost...or u shud be my best phraand...

either ways .... it dont really matter.. what u are about to read is a nice song..which we did listen when we were young.... now that we are not young... but not really old... we ignore it...

they always play it on 15th august and 26th jan... i wonder why....


here it is.... a nice baBa's version of it..... hope u like it... hope u hate it too.... ( increasing the size of the hindi font for all those who have trouble reading hindi )
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सारे जहाँ से अच्छा ..है मेरे neighbor का बच्चा
वोः चुलबुला है मेरा ... में गुलसितां हूँ उसका ।।

ऑफिस में हूँ अगर में ... रहता है वोह मेरे दिल में
समझो वही हमे भी ... जिगर का टुकडा है वोह हमारा

पार्वती को ना पता हे ... हमसाया शमा का
वोः संतान है हमारी ... वोः सपना है हमारा॥

सारे जहाँ से अच्छा ..है मेरे neighbor का बच्चा
वोः चुलबुला है मेरा ... में गुलसितां हूँ उसका॥

गोदी में खेलता है... उसकी हजोरों नत-खटिया
गुलशन भड़क जायेगा... भांडा जो अगर फूटा...... मुश्किल हो जायेगा जीना॥

क्या तुम्हे याद है वोह दिन ...
जहाँ शुरू हुआ उसका कारवां ....

यूनान - ओ -मिस्र - ओ -रोमा , सब मिट गए जहाँ से
अब तक मगर है बाकी , नम - ओ - निशान हमारा ॥

सारे जहाँ से अच्छा ..है मेरे neighbor का बच्चा
वोः चुलबुला है मेरा ... में गुलसितां हूँ उसका

मजहब नही सीखता ... मिल बांटके वोह खाता
हिंदू हूँ में... मुस्लिम है वोह ... बच्चा का कोई mistake नही उसमें ....

सारे जहाँ से अच्छा ..है मेरे neighbor का बच्चा
वोः चुलबुला है मेरा ... में गुलसितां हूँ उसका


ok... now all might like this..not all might understand this... but who the hell cares about everyone..

i am sure all will atleast murmur.. the first line... ;)

सारे जहाँ से अच्छा ..है मेरे neighbor का बच्चा
वोः चुलबुला है मेरा ... में गुलसितां हूँ उसका ।।



ho ho ho... "fuck..whats wrong with me... " ... peace! peace!! peace!!! ... a piece for all...

dont send jihadi ppl to get my ass.. its worthless.... nor the RSS or the nor the ISI nor the CBI ....


raKH05041982

life is a fruit-salad :)

before u read anything further... remember this.. this is coming out of personal experience (".)

when u get drunk... please dont brush ur teeth with shaving cream . . . its no fun....in fact just go to sleep... its OK if u dont brush ur teeth before bed.....

metrosexuals (mtsxl) .... i am not one of them...i think .. i think ... i think..i am a hippie... at least i was one till i didn’t take up this job....now the hippie looks are gone.... I am still letting the hippie live inside me… just in case I need him during the WWIII … now this is what happens in today’s world.... we all have jobs...we all get up in the morning... some have trouble downloading...some don’t... i for that matter have no worries at all.... I just have to sit on the commode ...and not do anything... the bowels just want to get hell out of me... as if they are suffocating inside..... thank you thank you...my smaller intestine....then we go to work....some take the car...some take public transport... some actaully work...or some pretend to work....some come straight back to home to their wife and kids... while some take the patlee galli and head to pubs, bars, lounges ...or wherever life takes them...some have a good day...some have bad day.....some care...some dont.... some are comfotably NUMB...some are comfortably DUMB...

Ok...this is not what this post is about..

Coming to the original idea of the post….he he…there is no idea…

so there is this imaginary dude human being...no no.... he is not doing his MBA... for heavens sake... not all are fools... I don’t know if he is a metrosexuals (mtsxl)….

so he gets up in the morning... brushes his teeth ....the flavor is strawberry... yup ..he still likes to use the toothpaste... which he used when he was a kid....rinses his mouth....( i want to try that toothpaste... all my life i have used that white and red "khol-gate" ... white paste.. yeah.. u are right....i do have cavities...unlike what the adv promises.... and that mofo suraksha chakra.... and that ting noise .... is nothing compared to the drilling noise of the dentists drills....dentists... u ppl are life-savers )

so now...after brushing his teeth.... dude is late....so heads straight under the shower.... so... nunga-punga bath chalu... raat ko aamla ka tel se chumpi kiya hai ( wah-tikka tel. . .reminds me of lovely mandira bedi… extraaa shots :P ) ….to sabse pehle fructis ( I am sure this shampoo can be used as a nice topping cream in most of the European dishes )_ ...man this shampoo is nice... try it... smells like a lot of fruits are crushed in it.... then saboon lagane ke bari... saboon is also fruit flavored ...one of those Chinese soaps with apple flavor ( lol chinese soaps...they are gonna take over....and amreeka is gonna feed them )…. Nahake ho gaya….shave karne ki baari ( its one of the most irritating activity for hippies… but thank god…he only gave us the brains to shave of dadhi… )… shaving cream lemon flavoured + aloe vera ( they say this aloe vera thing is miraculous )…. Aftershave is bloody pomegranate flavored + with added menthol … combs his hair… styling gel…coconut flavored…. (rotflol coconut )

lol…. He is turning into a fruit salad ….( sala i actually made that word rangeela... ha ha ha....i have so much free time.. and no money in the pocket to go have a beer.... )

Now time to put of some deodorant… again fruit flavored… watermelon :P

All dressed up…. Drinks milk… has some jelly… he loves jelly… almost close to being a complete fruit salad… ( who the hell invented the fruit salad ? .. .must be an accident.. .where the wife has got angry and gone to maikaaa ... and the hubby ...pooor hubby has to cook for himself )

God damn it…. Brain super heating…. Fuck fuck fuck…. Fruit-salad…. I miss it….I WANT FRUIT SALAD

All those vitamins ….. all those fibers….. all those …

Just fuck it… I am going to FETCH some food…. Living in dog years ;)

PS : “to life..”…. It rained in MUMBAI today… thanks to u... life… I missed it…though I had a nice sunbath here in Chennai… sunscreens don’t work here…

raKH05041982